Sally's story

"My dad was first diagnosed with Dementia in January 2020 just before lockdown. He had shown a lot of signs and symptoms for a few years prior, and it was quite difficult to get a diagnosis, but we eventually got this in 2020. 

"My dad is affected by dementia in many ways. When he was first diagnosed, his symptoms were quite mild compared to now, he had a lot of forgetfulness, doing things such as putting the kettle in the fridge, not knowing where he was, and not knowing the times of the day- he would sometimes get up in the middle of the night confused.  

"Before his diagnosis Dad was very independent and enjoyed walking, gardening and bird watching – he could tell you every Latin name of every plant in his garden! Now he doesn't recognise everyday flowers such as daffodils. He spent a lot of time as a volunteer station master at Grosmont Station on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway. 

"Over time his dementia has got progressively worse, to the point where I wonder whether he knows who I am now at times. He has 5 grandchildren and 7 great-grandchildren, and he used to enjoy spending time with them. Now when they visit he doesn’t know who they are and it can be heart-breaking to watch.  

"Dad’s dementia impacts his daily life completely, he’s very confused and doesn’t like to be in unfamiliar places or crowded spaces. He gets very upset by loud noises and gets startled easily. His condition is very debilitating to the point where Dad can no longer live a normal life.  

"As a family, the past 4 years have been incredibly difficult. We had to make the heart-breaking decision to move Dad into a care home as it was becoming increasingly difficult for Mum to care for him at home. We made this decision as a family as we knew it was the best place for Dad as the care home could meet his needs better. There isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t wish Dad could be at home – sadly though that isn’t possible for so many people living with dementia.  

"Dad is not aware of his own dementia. He has deteriorated a lot over the past year to the point where he needs support with daily tasks such as showering, dressing and taking medication. At mealtimes he needs support and encouragement with eating and he also struggles with communication, not really being able to tell us if he is in pain or uncomfortable. 

"It’s been extremely hard watching the decline of my lovely Dad and watching him go into the care home. This past year has been difficult as Dad’s health has also declined, he’s falling a lot more, his mobility is decreasing, and he’s been in and out of hospital with chest infections and pneumonia. 

"When my Dad is admitted to hospital it makes me incredibly nervous. I worry so much when Dad is admitted because the noisy, overstimulating and chaotic atmosphere of a hospital can be really distressing for him. He can also tend to be a bit of a wanderer. At the care home the staff know his individual needs and I can relax a bit more knowing that he is in familiar surroundings.  

"I think the launch of the Dementia Appeal is fantastic. I hope the appeal will enhance the experience that patients like my dad have when admitted to hospital.

"To anyone who is thinking of donating to the appeal, please do. You never know if a member of your family is going to be affected by dementia and it affects everyone so differently. The changes to the hospital could support you and your loved ones in the future. I never thought for one minute the difficulties that dementia could cause to our family. Anything that can be done to make life easier for patients like my Dad will be amazing."